Resume
Razors pain you;
Rivers are damp;
Acids stain you;
And drugs cause cramp.
Guns aren't lawful;
Nooses give;
Gas smells awful;
You might as well live.   -D. Parker

Aug 2, 2003
I am about halfway done editing the site. To me it is icy blue with white with splashes of color. To you it is still bright blue pink, white and black with a missing graphic. 

On to the changes, reader. The organization is this: the links up top appear in different locations. I think you'll like that. No more having to actually read. More location than anything. Thinking you know where it is more than you know the word.

July 4, 2003
Happy holiday everyone! I hope you all ate well. Cooking and eating seems like the perfect thing to be doing while things that look pretty are exploding.

The photos from the walk are in and we're good-looken' Ladies.
<--A photo of Candice and I walking said 10 miles.
Candice and I walked ten miles in a race. All the while chanting the words:

My last few entries have tried hard not to make sense. I was feeling artsy but now I don't as much. The Annie link from last entry said more than anything else. Check out that great tribute page to the one the only red-headed orphan who stole your heart in that wonderful piece of work, starring Bernadette Peters, Carol Burnette among others: : : :I again give you...... Annie. Seriously. ANNIE!!! I cannot read the lyrics to Maybe without getting a little teary. I am not made of stone.
 

Maybe
Maybe far away,
or Maybe real near by.
He may be pouring her coffee,
she may be straight'ning his tie.

I've got Annie!!!


June 5th, 2003
It must be sad
The only one of your kind
It must be bad
Your crisis of time

Lots was going on but was I happy? I didn't have much time to consider this. The quest for food took up most of my days and the nights were spent cleaning, scheming, and arranging things for the morning.  

My cellulon was busted. I hadn't considered this as a possibility. But now that it was burning in the salt mines the good ideas flooded me. What about trying to practice fixing another computer? I could make mistakes and learn then apply what I learned to my new computer.

Those options weren't possible now anyway. I didn't have time and my cellulon was pretty much more for my own piece of mind then anything else.

Marty McFly and I had a lot in common. My young grandparents were thousands of miles away and I had to steal a car to get to them. Quick.

June 1st, 2003

Jimmy Huges New Blue Shoes
Jimmy Hughes had the Blues
And every day they grew and grew
His friends called to see if he would play but he refused
His dog nudged him to come out one day but Jimmy Huges had a short fuse
Jimmy was sad and confused
He knew he had a lot to Lose
He knew he had nothing to do
His friends called less and less
and his dog started to give up too

Jimmy didn't want to have the blues
So jimmy went on a walk
a long walk
window he saw something
A strange pair of somethings
He eyed them like a hawk

"No news is good news"
and Jimmy bought some new shoes.
He now has too much to do
and no time to talk about his new shoes but I do.

His shoes are new, untied and blue.
Show me the person who doesn't love new shoes!

He runs to the beach with his new shoes.
He falls on shells but kept running on through.

He ran on the tracks by the abandoned shack
and he ran on through.
He stopped to arch his back.
He ran and his watch jingled.
He ran and his cheeks bobbled.
Now he has shoes and they are blue.

His friends run and his dog runs.
He runs 'cause he can he runs in the rain.
He runs to run.
Even more fun.
 
-------------_________++++++++
Playing music with the talented Jen Faith these days. She plays bass. So much fun. Tune in for more info on that...
(((((((--------------------)))))))))))))

May 21st 2003


Be nice and reasonable
as much as you can and 
as often as possible


It's been so cold
Brrr.
 

I really can't stay
But baby it's cold outside
I've got to go away
But baby its cold outside
This evening has been
Been hopen that you'd drop in
So nice and warm         - Frank Loesser

Then so hot

I don't know why, but everyone seems to be down or worse down on themselves. Have you noticed this trend? Maybe it isn't a trend...Maybe it's how it has always been, but I feel like everyone's just not sure where they fit in or what they have to offer. It's kind of a bummer.  You are worth it, people! Turn that frown upside down!


May 3rd 2003
I am in DJ training. I am learning radio things. This summer should be relaxed.

Reading a book called Random Family. Like Mario Puzzo's work or Welfare Mother. I like it.

April 19, 2003

Another good man gone I just saw SLC punk starring Matthew Lillard as  a wayward punk.  His then manager called him and said "Kid, we hit the jackpot with this punk movie, your career should be fine after this film. My work here is done. I'm now going on vacation to Phoenix."

Lillard played a big bad-ass in this movie because he had blue hair and was beating people up mercilessly.  Good stuff.

Contrary to popular belief, Lillard is not another slang word for wimp. Despite this, Matthew's temporary agent, Terry Summer, considers Lillard the tall DiCaprio. He continues to aim his sights on any role Leonardo is too short for like It's a Very Muppet Christmas and Summer Catch.

This lack of restraint has caused severe damage to his career. Any progress he made in SLC Punk was hastily negated in the first half hour of Love's Labour's Lost where he sings and dances in Shakespearean dialect. 

See, Terry is a rookie and didn't attend the Hollywood Agent seminar entitled "How cartoon character rolls ruin your client's dreams of acting on camera."  Terry would have learned that comic book superheroes are the only viable cartoon acting option.

Two short years later, Dillard unwittingly delivered what wrestlers call a fatal crushing headlock to his livelihood by tackling his least bad-ass role yet as Shaggy in  Warner Brother's Scooby Doo II.

Matthew Lillard has gone the way of Brandon Frasure. 

March 23, 2003

Little facsimiles
coincidences tragedies
repeat myself
just like me
crises
crises



My cousin Joe wrote a song . . . and it's good. I played music with my younger cousin. Oh, what fun. We talked about the old times.

Like the ping pong paddle butt match showdown. The rules were simple. The rounds many. In this game you went one-on-one with a cousin. Each person was equipped with one ping pong paddle. The objet was to land a butt smack in.

During one of the more heated rounds, a paddle broke on Joey's butt. He remembered that. Did it leave a mark? I didn't ask. What I do know is that children should be supervised more closely.

Also, the world continues to kick all of our asses. Steadily and with rhythm. But soon it won't be so. Things will turn around. Because burden you carry turns into something lighter and inspirational with time. No one wins a marathon without tragedy in the rear view mirror. We again have a tragedy. Dave, Mom, Mart, and I assemble on the East coast and plan and get rid of bags of clothes and photos, and makeup and purses and things you don't think you'll do. We have phone conversations and take walks and look at walls and think like you always mean to do. You can't help but remember good things.

As a tour guide for the University of Illinois in Champaign-Urbana, my job was to smile. I was forced on a day-to-day basis to act like I attended school at Disney World. I raised my arms in the warm summer sun and showed my tour groups how much I enjoyed the fresh campus air.  I was reminded about smiling. To strangers to friends. A teaspoon.  : )  "Old friends" a classic song by Simon and Garfunkle. It might just make you emotional.


Old friends,
Old friends,
Sat on their park bench like bookends.
A newspaper blown through the grass,
Falls on the round toes,
Of the high shoes,
Of the old friends.

Old friends.
Winter companions the old men,
Lost in their overcoats waiting for the sun.
The sounds of the city sifting through trees,
Settle like dust,
On the shoulders,
Of the old friends.

Can you imagine us years from today,
Sharing a park bench quietly?
How terribly strange to be seventy.

Old friends.
Memory brushes the same years,
Silently sharing the same fears.

Time it was, and what a time it was, it was.
A time of innocence,
A time of confidences.
Long ago, it must be.
I have a photograph.
Preserve your memories --
They're all that's left you.
Copyright © 1968 Paul Simon


I don't feel good about not calling people back. I haven't been feeling social. Too bad its 4am. My friends are asleep.

I have jet lag from a trip to Maryland (and a little Virginia). I was just getting over my Pacific jetlag only to fly to the other end and experience Atlantic jetlag.  I never remembered which was which. But I taught myself with a song. "oh there's no place like home for the holidays . . . from the Atlantic to the pacific the traffic sure looks terrific" I will go to sleep soon with tragedy on my back but I can still remember. I will feel bad I haven't called my friends back.  I will feel sad that someone's gone but I can still smile.


March 8, 2003
Have you ever felt like a Taxi Driver?




These past few days, I've been getting very bad customer service from the Planet. Two parking tickets, one destroyed cash card. How can you tell I need some kicking in the rear? Thank you, world!


March 5, 2003
How can you explain things like the
popularity of Strawberry Shortcake?

You can't.  But someone can.

Those who say it can't be done should
get out of the way for the people doing it.

I was sure based on experience that I was dyslexic. How do you explain all of those flights I was certain took off at 9am. I checked. I checked twice. I checked with people standing right there. Yeah, 9am like I said. I wrote it down right here. See?

February 28, 2003
ye got a pot of gold
how about a shamrock
for my poor dear mother in Ireland?


 
I'm going to LA and Chicago soon. A good thing because I'm due for a vacay in the worst way. I am always working on something lately and the best time to get perspective is when you are in the middle of a plane trip. No distractions in the air.  What will I decide this trip? Something involving a polar bear?

You may note a leprechaun above. He is the official dwarf of St. Patrick's Day.  All that can be said about St. Patrick's day is this: People tend to use this particular holiday to drink themselves silly. And once, I did the same thing on a St. Patrick's Day in Chicago. That day I learned what Erin Go Braugh means. Erin Go Brauh appeared on a glittery holiday sign hanging in a bar.

It means Ireland Forever!!!  I even remembered how to spell it. Hi-ya.

I traveled to Ireland and worked at a burger and fries place called Magnum's in Roscommon. I was paid room and board and forty dollars a week. All I could hear was "Rah, Bardaly flop Pints" The plan was to have me waitress. How cute to have an american wait on you? Well, after about two minutes of me repeating "Could you please repeat that?" over and over I got moved in back to scrub the dishes.


I'm struck right now about the connections and themes that appear and reappear throughout one's life. We are approaching so many things and we pick things to assign our meaning and our antennae is up for those things with our meaning. And voila life makes sense when it's organized by us doesn't it? 

February 21, 2003

paws and think for a moment
about black white and gray




I've been listening to Eminem. I've been randomly thinking of his lyrics.  They are good. Mainly because they live within a theme.     
 

January 24, 2003 Pages of web
pages I said

Pages rage
on the days
they spread


Shedding extracurricular activities. Getting rid of some pastimes including the Writer's Group and West Coast Performer. Paring down to just KALX. I'm preparing my schedule to attend graduate school in the fall of 2003.
 

January 10, 2003

 Topics include girl power, music, and tools on the Web.

I visited Mills College and was extremely impressed as I learned about the Interdisciplinary Computer Science Master's Program. I could combine Computer Science with another field.

A short string of bad luck. . . My car. My silver and gray two toned, leather interior, Four liter, 1985 Buick Century. Stolen. I missed the silver bullet.

The heartless losers clumsily tore apart my steering column and left it for dead a few miles away. Since my Verizon Wireless service failed me, I didn't learn of the recovery until  three days and $300 later. The steering column is $500.

I had a root canal that same week too. If we were to take a close look at the circle of hate, we'd not deny, I was the victim of stupid people, bad luck, and inoperable phones.

To be honest, I didn't know who to hate. I just aimed my sarcasm and pissy attitude towards anyone who I had to speak with that day. I called Verizon Wireless and explained their failure only to earn a four dollar credit. That is less than 1 percent of my current financial responsibility due to my phone not displaying I had messages, when in fact, I had six.

Did I mention I was up all night working? Oh yeah. This was in between two twelve hour shifts. I didn't get any sleep. At all. And I was attempting to recover my car from the towing company. Only they needed a form from Oakland Police. Only the Oakland Police form wasn't sufficient, I needed to get a form Alameda County Sheriff's Office.

That's one town over in a gas guzzler loaner. With my car stolen and all, they really like to put your resources to the test.

So the County Sheriffs, then to the towing company, then waiting for Triple A,  then home. We started at 2pm and the car was in front of my house at nightfall--around 7pm. 

I am now paying 500 dollars to get my car's steering column fixed. I know, I know.

On I plow not safe nor sound
Locking doors and speaking nouns

January 1, 2003

...Rachel and The Rentals...





 

Free time is the calm before the storm. The Puritans knew it and you should too. I am now working on my Mills College essay, work, sleep and little else. Starting up is many a role and responsibility. Most extracurricular activity.

I can't handle all of these things forever. Things are suffering. Demanding time and energy I don't have. Look for updates on what gets dropped and what stays.